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What's a pirate's favorite type of music? Sea-shanties with a lot of ship-pounding beats!
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Why did the loaf of bread break up with the butter? It couldn't handle the constant pounding in the relationship.
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Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many unresolved issues with constant keyboard pounding.
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Why don't oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish and prefer to keep their pearls away from any clam-pounding philanthropy.
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I was going to tell a time-travel joke, but you didn't like it. It was too much of a past-pounding.
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Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged and experienced a serious case of bean-pounding.
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I told my computer it's getting old, and it responded with 'age is just a number, but RAM is a serious pounding concern.
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My neighbor complained about the noise coming from my apartment. I told him I was just following the doctor's orders and working on my 'pounding' exercises. Now he thinks I'm the fittest person in the building, thanks to my daily keyboard workouts!
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I recently got a new job as a drummer, and my boss told me to focus on my 'pounding' skills. Little did he know, I've been perfecting those skills on my neighbor's door every time they play loud music at 3 AM!
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My friends convinced me to join a DIY home improvement workshop. The only thing I learned was that 'pounding' a nail into the wall requires way more precision than angrily tapping it with a shoe like I usually do.
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The other day, I tried to join a fitness class, and the instructor said we'll be doing some intense cardio. I thought, great, I'm already an expert at cardio. I've been pounding on the office printer for years, trying to get it to work!
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I decided to take up boxing to stay fit. My coach asked if I had any experience with 'pounding.' I said, 'Absolutely, I've been pounding on the snooze button every morning for years. Does that count?'
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I bought a stress ball to help me manage my anger. Now, instead of pounding on my keyboard when I'm frustrated, I just squeeze that poor stress ball until it begs for mercy. It's like anger management, but for introverts.
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I signed up for a cooking class, and the chef said the secret to a good sauce is 'pounding' the ingredients. Well, let's just say my kitchen turned into a crime scene, and my blender filed for worker's compensation.
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I tried making homemade bread for the first time, and the recipe said to knead the dough until it's 'pounding.' Well, let's just say my kitchen now looks like a crime scene from a flour explosion. Who knew bread-making was a full-contact sport?
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I went on a blind date, and the guy asked if I like 'pounding' music. I said, 'Sure, as long as it's my upstairs neighbor's taste in music, so I can drown it out with my broomstick percussion orchestra.'
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