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Why did Osama bin Laden never get invited to any parties? Because he always made a bomb entrance!
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Why did Osama bin Laden never become a stand-up comedian? His jokes always seemed to bomb!
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Why did Osama bin Laden always carry a watch during missions? Because it was time for some explosive action!
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Why did Osama bin Laden never go to the beach? He didn't want to be caught in the 'Sunni' day!
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Why did Osama bin Laden become a gardener? He had a knack for planting 'terror-seeds'!
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Why did Osama bin Laden join a music band? He wanted to drop some 'bomb-beats'!
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Why did Osama bin Laden never become a chef? His recipes were always 'explosively' bad!
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Why did Osama bin Laden never open a zoo? He thought it was easier to release 'terror-cats' in the wild!
Osama's Hide-and-Seek Champion
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I heard Osama was a hide-and-seek champion. I mean, the guy managed to hide for a decade, and we had the entire U.S. military looking for him. Maybe we should recruit him to teach us some real ninja moves.
Osama's Failed Career in Comedy
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You know, I heard Osama once tried stand-up comedy. Yeah, apparently, his opening joke was a real bomb. But hey, at least he had a killer closing act – literally.
Osama's DIY Security Tips
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Osama must have been a do-it-yourself security expert. I mean, he built that compound himself, right? Maybe he hosted a YouTube channel on the side, with tutorials like Building a Terrorist Hideout: A Step-by-Step Guide.
Osama's Unsuccessful Reality Show
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I think Osama missed his true calling – reality TV. Can you imagine him on a show like Survivor? He'd be the guy in the cave, outwitting, outplaying, and outlasting everyone, with a side of global terrorism drama.
Osama's GPS Troubles
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Osama must have had some serious GPS issues. I can't even find my car in the mall parking lot, and this guy successfully avoided the entire U.S. military for years. Maybe he was using Apple Maps – you know, taking the scenic route through Afghanistan.
Operation Osama
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You know, I recently discovered there's an operation named after Osama. I mean, come on, really? Naming a military operation after a guy we spent a decade trying to catch? What's next? Operation Where's Waldo? Are we planning on hiding from him in crowded bookstores?
Osama's Last Words
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I wonder what Osama's last words were. Maybe he looked at the SEAL Team 6 and said, You guys are early for my surprise birthday party! Talk about a party pooper.
Osama's Real Estate Expertise
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I heard Osama was really into real estate. I mean, he was living in a million-dollar mansion right next to a military academy. Talk about location, location, location. I can barely afford a studio apartment, and this guy had a compound with a view of helicopters flying overhead.
Osama's Posthumous Memoir
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I wonder if Osama ever considered writing a memoir. I can see the title now: From Cave to Mansion: A Terrorist's Guide to Real Estate. Chapter one: How to Avoid Drone Strikes and Still Have a Great View.
Osama, the Ultimate Escape Artist
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Osama was like the Houdini of terrorists. I mean, who needs a straightjacket and a water tank when you can evade the world's most advanced intelligence agencies? Maybe David Blaine should take notes – Osama's disappearing act was legendary.
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