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Why don't office plants gossip at parties? They know how to stay rooted in their business!
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Why did the pencil bring a notepad to the office party? It wanted to draw attention!
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Why did the spreadsheet break up with the database at the office party? It felt too confined!
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Why don't scientists trust atoms at office parties? Because they make up everything!
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Why did the office party turn into a math class? Too many problems to solve!
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Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged at the office party!
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Why don't office parties ever get started? Because they can't find the right combination of spreadsheets and spirits!
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What did the stapler say to the paper at the office party? 'Let's stick together!
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Why did the office chair go to therapy? It had too many issues with commitment!
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Why did the document go to therapy? It had too many emotional attachments.
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At the office party, they tried to have a talent show. Let's just say, after the guy from accounting attempted to juggle staplers, we all agreed that some talents should remain hidden in the cubicle.
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The theme of last year's office party was 'retro,' which apparently meant everyone dressing like they were from the '80s. I walked in and thought I accidentally stepped into a Back to the Future reboot – Marty McFly would have felt overdressed!
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I asked my boss if we could have a remote office party this year. He said, 'Sure, just make sure your virtual background is the breakroom, and your drink is pixelated.' Nothing says celebration like a glitchy martini.
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You know your office party is going downhill when the highlight is the performance by Dave from IT playing the spoons. I didn't even know he played an instrument, unless you count the keyboard.
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They say the office party is a great time for networking, but the only connection I made was with the photocopier repair guy. We bonded over how many paper jams it endured during the 'Electric Slide.'
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At the office party, they try to make it festive with decorations, but it's like putting lipstick on a fax machine. No matter how many tinsel strands you drape on it, it's still a party in the photocopier room.
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The office party is the only place where the boss tries to be cool by telling dad jokes. Last year, he said, 'Why did the spreadsheet go to therapy? Because it had too many issues!' I'm pretty sure Excel groaned from that one.
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The only time people volunteer to organize the office party is when they want to be in the spotlight. It's like being the captain of the Titanic and thinking, 'This is my chance to shine!'
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I tried to impress my colleagues at the office party with my dance moves, but apparently, doing the robot doesn't count as a team-building exercise. HR called it 'malfunctioning in the workplace.'
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