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Why did the mitten go to school? To improve its 'glove'-erall knowledge!
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What do you call a mitten that becomes a musician? A 'thumb'-piano player!
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Mittens – because sometimes I like to feel fancy while picking up my cat's hairballs. It's like high-class furball management.
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Why do they call them mittens? Sounds like a secret society for hands. 'Welcome to the Mitten Club, where our motto is 'Fingers Together, We Stand.'
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I lost one of my mittens last week. If you see a lonely mitten out there, looking for love, just know that its partner is probably warming up to a new hand right now. It's a cold world out there, even for mittens.
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You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new pair of mittens. I used to get excited about video games, now it's all about the perfect hand warmth ratio.
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Mittens are like socks for your hands – they mysteriously disappear, leaving you with a solo mitten desperately searching for its long-lost partner. It's the tragic love story of winter apparel.
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I saw someone knitting mittens on the bus. I thought, 'Wow, that's commitment to hand warmth.' Meanwhile, I struggle to commit to a TV show for more than three episodes.
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You ever notice how mittens make clapping sound like a baby seal trying to start a slow clap? Not the most intimidating applause, but hey, at least your hands are cozy.
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I tried to knit my own mittens once. Ended up with something that resembled a woolly pancake. Let's just say, my hands were not impressed with my DIY fashion sense.
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I bought mittens with touchscreen capability. Now I can confidently answer calls in the freezing cold without looking like I'm doing the chicken dance with my phone.
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