4 Kids Ages 10-11 Jokes

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Sep 10 2024

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So, I asked these 10 and 11-year-olds about school, and apparently, homework is still a thing. I was like, "Wait, you mean they haven't replaced textbooks with holograms yet?" These kids have backpacks that are probably more powerful than my first computer.
I tried helping one with their math homework, and I felt like I was deciphering an alien language. "Why are there letters in math now? What happened to good old numbers?" And the kid goes, "Oh, that's algebra." Algebra? When I was their age, the only 'X' I knew was the one that marked the spot for buried treasure.
But seriously, these kids are dealing with some intense subjects. I asked about science, and they started talking about things like quantum physics and black holes. I'm over here still trying to figure out why I can't fold a fitted sheet properly.
Homework used to be about coloring inside the lines, not solving equations that require advanced degrees. If these kids keep this up, by the time they're 16, they'll probably be tutoring me in quantum mechanics.
You ever try talking to kids these days? I recently had a conversation with a group of 10 and 11-year-olds, and it felt like I was negotiating with tiny lawyers. These kids are like mini-adults with a sprinkle of unpredictability. I asked them what they wanted to be when they grow up, and one kid said, "I want to be an influencer." I didn't even know what an influencer was at that age; I just wanted to be a ninja turtle.
And don't get me started on their use of technology. I handed one of them a landline phone, and they stared at it like it was an ancient artifact. I was like, "No, it doesn't have emojis, but you can actually talk to people on it." They looked at me like I was suggesting we communicate via carrier pigeon.
It's like they're in a constant state of preparing for a TED Talk. I tried telling them about the struggles of dial-up internet, and they looked at me like I was describing the dark ages. "You mean, like, no Wi-Fi? How did you survive?"
Seems like these kids are born with a built-in USB port, ready to download the latest trends directly into their brains. I miss the days when my biggest worry was whether I could trade my lunch for a cool pencil.
You know, talking to 10 and 11-year-olds also made me realize the struggles of being a parent. Parents are like superheroes, but instead of capes, they wear exhaustion. I asked these kids about their parents, and they had some interesting insights.
One kid said, "My mom is always on her phone." I thought, "Well, maybe she's trying to decipher your sibling's cryptic messages in the family group chat." Another kid goes, "My dad is always grumpy in the morning." I wanted to tell him, "Welcome to adulthood, kid. Mornings are like a battle with toast crumbs and misplaced car keys."
And bedtime? It's like negotiating a peace treaty. One kid told me, "I always get an extra story if I brush my teeth super well." I wish that tactic worked for adults. "Boss, I finished the project early. Can I get an extra day off?"
Parenting these days seems like a mix between a chess game and a stand-up comedy routine. You've got to be strategic, always ready with a punchline, and occasionally sacrifice a pawn (or a good night's sleep).
Talking to 10 and 11-year-olds also made me realize how different their social lives are compared to when I was their age. They're like miniature social media managers with juice boxes.
I asked them about their friends, and one kid goes, "Well, Sarah didn't invite me to her birthday party, but she liked my post on Instagram." I was like, "Back in my day, if you didn't get a birthday invitation, you didn't have a clue it even happened."
And the drama? It's like a soap opera on fast-forward. They were telling me about friendship triangles, and I was trying to remember if my biggest friendship concern at that age was who got the last slice of pizza.
These kids are growing up with a different set of social skills. They can probably negotiate a peace treaty with rival lemonade stands and settle playground disputes with a well-crafted TikTok dance. It's a brave new world out there, and I'm just trying to keep up with the hashtags.

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