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Why did the student bring a ladder to the library? Because he wanted to go to the next level of reading!
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What's a pirate's favorite book? One that's full of adventures on the high seas!
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What do you call a book club that's been stuck on the same book for years? Slow readers anonymous!
The Lord of the Unfinished Chores
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My kids are big fans of fantasy novels. I tried to turn chores into an epic quest. I told them, You are the chosen one, the Lord of the Unfinished Chores. Turns out, they weren't as thrilled as I thought. Frodo had it easy compared to them.
Fables for the Modern Parent
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I've started writing my own series of bedtime stories – Fables for the Modern Parent. The first one is about a mythical creature called the Tidy Room Troll. Legend has it, if you leave your room messy, the troll steals your video game controllers.
Reading or Negotiation 101?
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I tried to get my kids interested in classic literature. Gave them a copy of Shakespeare. They looked at it and said, Is this a negotiation manual? I thought, Hey, maybe Hamlet was onto something with all that 'to be or not to be' contemplation.
The Chronicles of Homework Avoidance
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Homework time is always a battle. My daughter comes up with more creative excuses than a politician caught in a scandal. I suggested we start a book club, but apparently, discussing math problems doesn't make for riveting conversation.
Harry Potter vs. Household Chores
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My son is obsessed with Harry Potter. I told him, If only you could use that magic wand to clean your room. He looked at me dead serious and said, Dad, even wizards have limits.
Mastering the Art of Selective Deafness
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My daughter is into reading too. She's got this magical ability to selectively hear things. I asked her to clean her room, and suddenly, she's engrossed in a novel. It's like she's mastered the art of selective deafness. Maybe I should try that at work.
War and Peace: The Battle for the TV Remote
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There's a war going on in my living room, and it's not in some far-off land. It's the battle for the TV remote. I suggested we turn it into a historical drama – War and Peace: The Epic Saga of Who Gets to Watch Cartoons.
The Lost World of Missing Socks
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I was trying to teach my kids about responsibility, you know, life skills and all that. So, I handed them a laundry basket and said, Go on an adventure to find the lost world of missing socks. They returned with half the socks and a conspiracy theory about the washing machine.
The Encyclopedia of Bedtime Excuses
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You know, kids these days are all about reading. My son asked me to read him a bedtime story, and I thought, Sure, easy enough. Little did I know he handed me this thick book called The Encyclopedia of Bedtime Excuses. I didn't realize we were entering a negotiation phase at bedtime.
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