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Why did the husband take a fishing pole to bed? He was trying to catch some sleep!
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Why did the wife bring a car to the dinner table? Because she wanted a drive-through meal!
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Why did the husband get his wife a fridge for her birthday? Because love may fade, but food is eternal!
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Why did the husband gift his wife a puzzle? To show her their relationship was missing a few pieces!
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Why did the husband sit on the computer? He wanted to press the right buttons and keep the family in touch!
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Why did the husband buy his wife some flowers after an argument? He wanted to plant the seed of forgiveness!
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Why did the husband bring a ladder to bed? Because he wanted to raise the bar!
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Why did the wife carry a photo of her husband in her purse? In case she needed some emergency cash!
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Why did the wife bring a clock to bed? She wanted to show her husband it's time to talk about their relationship!
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My wife asked me if I remember the day we got married. I told her, 'Of course, it was the day my gaming console suddenly had a 'Player 2' option.'
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My wife claims she can read my mind. I'm starting to believe her because she always knows when I'm thinking about ordering pizza.
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I suggested to my wife that we should try a new hobby together. She said, 'How about pretending to listen to each other?' Nailed it!
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They say marriage is about compromise. My wife and I compromise on what to watch on TV. She gets to choose the show, and I get to choose when to fall asleep during it.
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Marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. But after a few years, you're looking for a club and a spade just to survive.
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I asked my husband what he wanted for our anniversary. He said, 'An uninterrupted nap.' So, I booked him a hotel room.
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My wife and I decided to make a list of everything we find annoying about each other. Turns out, we both need more paper and ink than the IRS.
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I tried to impress my wife by fixing a leaky faucet. Now we have a brand new swimming pool in the kitchen.
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My husband thinks he's the king of the remote control. Little does he know, I've been secretly upgrading my Netflix password as my own form of rebellion.
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