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Hairdressers have this secret weapon called "product knowledge." They start recommending all these products, and I'm sitting there thinking, "I just wanted a trim, not a degree in cosmetology.
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You ever feel like a celebrity when they're blow-drying your hair? There's this moment where you think, "I could be on the cover of a magazine." And then reality hits, and you realize you're just going to the grocery store with extra volume.
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Hairdressers have this mystical ability to predict the future. You sit down, they examine your hair, and then they say things like, "In six weeks, you'll have a whole new look." Six weeks later, I'm still waiting for that transformation. Maybe they're just practicing their psychic skills on us.
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Hairdressers are like therapists, but with scissors. You sit in that chair, spill your life story, and hope they can work miracles on your hair while simultaneously fixing your existential crisis.
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They always ask, "How do you usually style your hair?" And I'm like, "Well, on most days, I try not to look like I just escaped a tornado." But hey, it's all part of the charm, right?
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Have you noticed how they strategically place mirrors everywhere in the salon? It's like a hall of mirrors, but instead of funhouse laughter, you hear the quiet sobbing of your wallet as it weeps for mercy.
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You ever notice how hairdressers have this ability to make small talk while holding a pair of scissors near your face? Like, "How's your day going?" Well, my day was fine until you started wielding sharp objects around my head, Karen.
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There's something about putting on that salon cape that makes you feel like a superhero. I mean, Superman has his cape, Batman has his cape, and I have my salon cape, ready to conquer the world with a fabulous blowout.
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They always ask, "Any specific requests?" And I'm tempted to say, "Make me look like I woke up like this." But instead, I mumble something like, "Just a trim, please," as if I have a clue about hairstyling lingo.
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