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I recently looked at a grade 2 printable about safety, and it had a picture of a kid wearing a helmet while riding a bike. Classic. Because nothing says "safety" like a helmet that's three sizes too big, making the kid look like he's auditioning for a space mission.
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You ever see those grade 2 printable word searches? They make you believe you're on a mission to find hidden treasures in a sea of letters. I spend more time looking for the word 'elephant' than I do looking for my car keys.
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I was looking at a grade 2 printable math sheet the other day, and it hit me – why do they always put these happy little animals next to the problems? Is there some joy in solving 7 + 3 that I'm missing? I've never seen a cat that excited about basic addition.
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There's always that one grade 2 printable that's like, "Connect the dots and reveal the mystery picture!" Spoiler alert: it's always a giraffe. Why is it never a ninja or a spaceship? I feel cheated.
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I saw a grade 2 printable on recycling the other day. It had arrows pointing to the bins for paper, plastic, and glass. They act like it's a complex puzzle. If a second-grader can't figure this out, we're in trouble.
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Grade 2 printables are all about shapes, right? Circles, squares, triangles – the classics. But have you ever noticed how they throw in the occasional trapezoid, acting like it's the rock star of geometry? I'm just waiting for the day I use trapezoid in a conversation.
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They teach kids cursive writing in grade 2, right? As if they're signing autographs on their lunchboxes. I tried writing my grocery list in cursive once, and now I can't find my broccoli – it looks like an indecipherable squiggle.
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The world of grade 2 printables seems to think we live in a universe where farmers and their animals have a profound impact on second-grade education. I've never seen so many cows and chickens in my life. I'm waiting for a grade 2 printable about city life with skyscrapers and taxi cabs.
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Grade 2 printables love telling stories through pictures. But have you noticed how every drawing of a person looks like they have three fingers? What's the deal? Are we teaching kids that being a mutant is the way to go?
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