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Fonzie was always around when someone needed advice. If I tried to give advice, it would probably sound like a confusing mix of self-help quotes and questionable life choices. "Just be yourself, but also, maybe don't eat that expired yogurt.
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Fonzie was the definition of effortless cool. I, on the other hand, need at least 30 minutes and a motivational TED Talk just to decide what to wear in the morning.
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The Fonz, you know, from Happy Days? I realized he was the original influencer. I mean, think about it - he walked into a room, snapped his fingers, and everyone was like, "Whoa, that's cool!" Nowadays, we need a million followers for that kind of impact.
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Fonzie was the master of the thumbs-up, right? But imagine if he existed today. He'd be constantly confused - is it still cool to give a thumbs-up, or are we all doing heart emojis now? Poor guy would be stuck in emoji limbo.
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Fonzie had the power to make jukeboxes play with just a touch. Meanwhile, I struggle to connect my phone to Bluetooth speakers. I end up pressing buttons like I'm defusing a bomb.
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You ever notice how "fonzie" sounds like the name of a secret agent from the '70s? "Bond, James Bond." Nah, give me "Fonzie, Cool Fonzie.
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Fonzie's leather jacket was his trademark. I wish I had a trademark like that. But if I walked around in a leather jacket all the time, people would just think I have a strange obsession with outerwear, not that I'm the coolest person in the room.
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Fonzie made fixing things by hitting them look so easy. I tried that with my laptop. Now I have a broken laptop and a sore hand. Maybe Fonzie had some secret mechanic powers we didn't know about.
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Fonzie rode a motorcycle. The closest I get to feeling cool on a bike is when I successfully navigate a crowded grocery store with a shopping cart without hitting anyone.
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