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What did the Ecuadorian volcano say to the tourist? 'I'm just 'Pichincha' a ride!'
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I asked my Ecuadorian friend how he stays in shape. He said, 'I'm always 'Cuenca'ing my steps!'
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Why was the Ecuadorian soccer team so good at scoring goals? Because they had 'Qatar'backs!
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Why did the Ecuadorian mathematician become a farmer? He wanted to 'multiply' crops in the 'Amazon'!
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Did you hear about the Ecuadorian who became a musician? He was really good at playing the 'Guaya-quil'ar!
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Why did the Ecuadorian chef always win cooking competitions? Because he had a secret 'Quito' his sleeve!
Ecuadorian Rain Dance
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In Ecuador, they have a rain dance, but it's more like a negotiation. Come on rain, we really need you today. And if it doesn't work, plan B is just using the national pastime – confusing tourists until they forget they wanted rain.
Ecuadorian Llamas
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Ecuadorian llamas must have attended llama drama school. I swear, you give them a camera, and suddenly they're posing like they're on the cover of a fashion magazine. Is my fur blowing in the Andean breeze just right?
Ecuadorian Confusion
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I asked an Ecuadorian friend about their national sport, and they said it's confusing tourists. I was like, Oh, I thought that was just a hobby!
Ecuadorian Eruptions
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You ever notice how ordering spicy food is like inviting a party to your mouth? I ordered this Ecuadorian dish the other day, and my taste buds were like, Dude, are we in Quito or experiencing a volcanic eruption?
Ecuadorian Sunscreen
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You know you're in Ecuador when the sunscreen isn't measured by SPF but by altitude. This one protects up to 2,850 meters, anything above, good luck turning into a human lobster!
Ecuadorian GPS
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I tried using an Ecuadorian GPS once. It was like, In 200 meters, turn right at the llama, then go straight until you see the guy selling pan flutes. If you hit the Amazon, you've gone too far!
Ecuadorian Elevators
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Ecuadorian elevators are a thrill ride. You press the button for the 10th floor, and it's like, Buckle up, we're going through the cloud forest first. Hope you're not afraid of heights!
Ecuadorian Jungle Survival
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I tried surviving in the Ecuadorian jungle once. Mosquitoes the size of condors, snakes that seemed to major in camouflage. I was just there with my bug spray and a map thinking, Did I sign up for an adventure or an episode of 'Survivor: Amazon Edition'?
Ecuadorian Souvenirs
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Ecuadorian souvenirs are unique. It's not your usual keychain or postcard; it's more like, Here, have a miniature replica of the Equator. Just be careful, if you put it on a slightly slanted surface, it might cause a geographical crisis!
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