4 Couples In English Jokes

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Dec 22 2024

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You ever notice how couples sometimes seem to be speaking a completely different language, even when they're speaking English? I mean, it's like they've got their own secret code, and the rest of us are just left scratching our heads.
The other day, I overheard this couple at a restaurant,
Couples, let's talk about bedtime negotiations. It's like trying to broker a peace treaty between two warring nations. You've got one person who wants the room as cold as the Arctic, and the other person who's stockpiling blankets like it's the Ice Age.
I was talking to my friend, and
Have you ever been grocery shopping with a couple? It's like a high-stakes game of cart chicken. They're pushing the cart, and neither of them wants to take the lead because, God forbid, they end up in the tampon aisle together.
I was at the supermarket the other day, and
Let's talk about the great battleground in every relationship – the thermostat. You've got the heat lovers and the cold warriors, and they're locked in this eternal struggle for control over a tiny little box on the wall.
I've seen couples negotiate over the thermostat like they're brokering a peace

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