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Isn't it weird that "chick flicks" are called that? Like, who decided that women enjoy movies about baby chickens? I'm still waiting for Hollywood to release "Dude Flicks" featuring action-packed adventures with actual dudes.
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You ever notice how cooking chicken is like a game of culinary Russian roulette? You follow the recipe, set the timer, and then anxiously check the oven, hoping you won't hear that ominous "chick" sound that tells you it's either perfectly roasted or destined for the dog.
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Ever notice how a chicken crossing the road is the original punchline to life's oldest joke? We're all just trying to figure out why the chicken dared to venture to the other side.
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You know you're an adult when your idea of a wild Friday night is binge-watching cooking shows and shouting at the TV, "No, don't overcook the chicken! It's a delicate dance, people!
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Chickens must have the ultimate social media, you know? They lay an egg, and suddenly, it's all over their feed: "Just laid the biggest egg of my life! #Eggstravaganza #CluckYeah
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I realized the other day that I have a love-hate relationship with my alarm clock. It's like, "Chick, chick, chick," in the morning, and I'm just lying there thinking, "Can't we just snooze through this, please?
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Chickens must be the original philosophers. They lay eggs, and we spend our entire lives trying to answer the age-old question, "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" I'm just over here wondering if I should scramble or fry it.
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Chickens must be the original influencers. They lay an egg, and suddenly all the other chickens are jealous, like, "Why didn't I think of that? Martha's egg just broke the internet!
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You ever notice that the little "chick" sound your car makes when you lock it feels like a tiny, electronic high-five? "Good job, you remembered to lock me! Let's hit the road, pal!
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