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There's a dentist in my neighborhood named Dr. Payne. I mean, come on! Did he choose the profession or did the profession choose him? "Well, my last name is Payne, might as well make a career out of it.
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I have a neighbor named Skip, but he's the slowest walker I've ever seen. Ironic, right? It's like his parents named him after what he's best at avoiding – a brisk pace.
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My friend Dave is always misplacing his keys. I told him, "Maybe it's a sign, Dave. Your keys are trying to tell you they want a new owner with a better sense of direction. Maybe someone named Navigator Nate.
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I have a friend named Penny who's always broke. It's like her parents were fortune tellers but misread the signs. "Let's call her Penny, she's destined for wealth!" Nope, not quite.
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I met a guy named Dusty recently. I couldn't help but wonder, do you think his parents just really hated vacuuming? "Let's name him Dusty, so he's a constant reminder of our eternal battle against dirt.
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You ever notice how people with the last name "Baker" never seem to have any interest in baking? It's like they missed the family memo. "Mom, Dad, why are we 'Bakers' if we're all terrible in the kitchen?
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Have you ever met someone named Cliff who was afraid of heights? It's like a cosmic mix-up. "Hi, I'm Cliff, but don't ask me to climb a ladder. I prefer to keep my feet on solid ground, thank you very much.
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Met a guy named Miles, but the only thing he runs is his mouth. Not sure if his parents misunderstood the concept of distance or if they were just hoping he'd go the extra mile in conversation.
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You ever notice that a lot of people named Grace don't seem to have the most graceful moves? I know a Grace who tripped over her own shadow. I guess the name is more of an aspiration than a reality.
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