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I tried teaching my parrot some useful phrases, like my phone number or my address, you know, just in case it gets lost. Now it just goes around the house yelling, "Call me maybe!" Well, at least it's got the catchy tunes down.
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You ever notice how owning a parrot is like having a feathery Alexa? But instead of responding to your commands, it just repeats your embarrassing secrets when you have guests over. "Hey, Polly, who's got a crush on the neighbor?" Thanks, Polly, real helpful.
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I read somewhere that parrots can live for decades. That's a commitment longer than most marriages! So, when I got one, I basically signed up for a lifelong relationship with a feathered companion who will probably outlive my favorite pair of socks.
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I thought having a parrot would make me feel like a pirate with a loyal sidekick. Turns out, it's more like having a tiny, judgmental therapist perched on my shoulder, constantly critiquing my life choices. "Squawk! You really need to work on your work-life balance, matey!
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Parrots are the only pets that can turn a simple conversation into a game of telephone. You tell them one thing, and by the time it reaches the parrot grapevine, suddenly you're the one who supposedly saw Bigfoot at the grocery store last week.
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Having a parrot is like having a tiny, colorful life coach that constantly repeats motivational phrases. The only problem is, when it starts saying, "You can do it! You're amazing!" during my Netflix binge, it's not exactly the pep talk I need.
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I got a parrot recently, thinking it would be a great way to liven up the house. Turns out, it's just a feathered stand-up comedian with a terrible sense of timing. I'll be telling a serious story, and suddenly it squawks, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Buddy, wrong joke, and it's not even the right species!
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Parrots are like the DJs of the animal kingdom. They pick up snippets of conversations and remix them into a cacophony of noise. I never knew my life could sound so chaotic until I got a parrot – it's like living in a bird version of a nightclub.
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You ever try having a phone conversation with someone while your parrot's in the room? It's like playing a game of "Is that your parrot or mine?" Suddenly, both birds are chiming in with their own opinions on your weekend plans.
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