17 Jokes About Northerners

Puns

Updated on: Mar 15 2025

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Why did the northerner bring a pencil to the snowstorm? In case he needed to draw his own conclusion!
Why did the northerner bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
What did the northerner say when he won the lottery? 'Ice-scream!
What do northerners call their morning routine? The 'frost and shine' ritual!
Did you hear about the northerner who took up gardening? He wanted to grow some frost-bitten peas!
What's a northerner's favorite type of music? Anything with a bit of a chill beat!
Why did the northerner become a chef? Because he wanted to make chilly con carne!
I went up north and asked for directions. They said, 'Go straight, eh?' I walked for hours and realized 'straight' meant 'take a left at the moose.' I ended up in a maple syrup factory.
I asked a northerner for the best local dish. They said, 'Poutine.' I tried it and thought, 'Gravy on fries with cheese curds? I've been eating that for years. They just gave it a fancy French name.'
Northern hospitality is real, but it's like they're trying to out-polite each other. 'You first.' 'No, you first.' It's a passive-aggressive standoff. I was stuck in a revolving door for an hour.
I love the accents up north. It's like they're apologizing for every vowel. 'Ooot and abooot.' It's so endearing. I tried it, and now people think I'm auditioning for a Canadian Shakespeare play.
Northerners are resilient. I saw a guy shoveling snow in shorts. I said, 'Aren't you cold?' He replied, 'Only if I stop moving.' It's like he's training for the Winter Olympics of Frostbite Dodgeball.
Visited the North and tried to fit in. I walked into a shop and asked, 'How's it going, eh?' The cashier replied, 'Good, thanks. How's it going, sorry?' Now, I'm not sure if I should be offended or apologetic.
Northerners have this uncanny ability to detect an outsider. I walked into a bar, and they all turned to look at me. It was like I was the only penguin in a room full of polar bears. 'What's this warm-weather guy doing here?'
Northerners are tough. I saw a guy wearing shorts in freezing weather. I asked, 'Aren't you cold?' He said, 'Nah, it's just a bit nippy.' Nippy? It's a polar vortex, not a gentle breeze!
I love the politeness up north, but it's confusing. They say 'sorry' for everything. I bumped into a guy, and he apologized. I said, 'No, it was my fault.' He replied, 'Sorry for making you feel that way.'
Up north, they have two seasons: winter and construction. I asked a local, 'When's the best time to visit?' They said, 'July 17th. It's the one day when there's no snow, and the construction workers take a break.'

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