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The Polar Bear
Trying to adapt to the disappearing ice in the Arctic
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You know you're in trouble when you're a polar bear, and the ice is melting faster than your chances of finding a decent stand-up comedy gig. It's like, "Come on, Mother Nature, give a bear a break!
The Ice Cube
Existential crisis about its purpose in life as it melts away
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I tried talking to my fellow ice cubes about my existential crisis, but they just told me to "chill out." Easier said than done when you're literally melting away. Maybe I should've pursued a career as a snow cone instead.
The Eskimo
Witnessing the traditional way of life disappearing due to the melting ice
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It's hard to be an Eskimo when your sled dogs have to paddle instead of run. I feel like I should rename them to "Aquatic Adventure Huskies." We're basically on an involuntary expedition to find the last patch of ice.
The Ice Cream
Dealing with the constant threat of melting on a hot summer day
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My dream is to have a summer vacation home in Antarctica. You know, a place where I can just chill without worrying about becoming a puddle of regret. I've heard the igloos have fantastic air conditioning.
The Refrigerator
Dealing with the guilt of contributing to the melting ice while keeping food cool
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You know you're a bad influence when even the ice cubes inside you start giving you the cold shoulder. It's like, "Come on, guys, I'm just trying to keep the leftovers from turning into a science experiment!
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