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Why did Melania bring a map to the speech? To navigate her way through all the 'Trump'ed-up policies!
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Melania's secret talent? 'Trum-pet' playing – she knows how to blow her own horn!
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What's Melania's favorite movie genre? 'First Lady in Action' – it's always a political thriller!
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Why did Melania bring a pencil to the interview? To draw her own conclusions!
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Why did Melania bring a broom to the political rally? She wanted to 'sweep' the competition!
Melania's Statue Status
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Melania's so still, I sometimes wonder if she's a statue that occasionally blinks. She's the Madame Tussauds exhibit that stepped out for fresh air and got stuck.
Melania's Perfect Poker Face
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Melania's got a poker face that could rival Lady Gaga's. I've seen more emotion in a brick wall than I have on her face during a State Dinner.
Melania's Silent Superpowers
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Melania's silence is her superpower. She's got the ability to make politicians nervous just by standing there. Forget about peace talks, just send in Melania for some awkward silence diplomacy.
Melania's White House Escape Plan
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Melania's the only First Lady who's mastered the art of the great escape. I bet she's got a tunnel dug out of the Rose Garden. If she leaves, it'll be via a secret Melania-shaped trap door.
Melania's Masterplan
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Melania has this uncanny ability to remain mysterious. I mean, she's got more secrets than a government vault. If she wrote a memoir, it'd be called The Art of the Silent Deal.
Melania's Fashion Faux Pas
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You know Melania's got style when she wears a jacket saying, I really don't care, do you? I mean, that's the same message my laundry basket gives me every day.
Melania's Cryptic Tweets
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Melania's tweets are like hieroglyphs. I need an archaeologist just to decipher them. It's like she's using Morse code for emotions.
Melania's Stealth Skills
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Melania's like a ninja in the White House. She's so good at disappearing, I half expect her to pop up on a milk carton someday. Have you seen this First Lady? Reward: Eternal Silence.
Melania's Mysterious Accent
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Melania's accent is like a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. I've spent more time decoding her speech than I have decoding IKEA instructions.
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