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Personal Trainer for Couch Potatoes
Motivating people allergic to exercise
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The only six-pack my clients have is in the fridge. Convincing them to do sit-ups is like negotiating with a cat for belly rubs – it's just not gonna happen.
Coffee Shop Barista during the Pumpkin Spice Season
Dealing with pumpkin spice enthusiasts
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Pumpkin spice is the glitter of the coffee world. Once you start making a pumpkin spice latte, you'll be finding cinnamon in weird places for weeks.
Office Printer Repair Guy
Dealing with temperamental office printers
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You know your job is unique when people look at you and say, "Oh, you fix printers? That must be a laugh a minute!" Yeah, especially when they try to print in color and end up with a grayscale rainbow.
Pet Psychic at a Cat Convention
Understanding the complex thoughts of cats
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Trying to communicate with cats is like having a conversation in a foreign language you only studied on Duolingo. You think you're saying, "I love you," but they hear, "Please knock all my stuff off the shelves.
Tech Support for Smart Refrigerators
Navigating the high-tech demands of refrigerators
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Smart refrigerators are like toddlers with a Wi-Fi connection. They can't tell you what's wrong, but they'll cry until you figure it out. And 9 times out of 10, it's just because someone left the milk out.
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