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Cupid's Apprentice
Trying to learn the ropes of matchmaking
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I accidentally shot myself with one of Cupid's arrows. Now every time I see someone attractive, I uncontrollably yell, "Be mine!" I got a date, but my neighbors think I've developed a sudden interest in gardening.
Valentine's Day Chef
Creating the perfect romantic meal
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My cooking skills are so bad; my microwave asked for cooking lessons. I made a romantic dinner with candles and everything, but when I lit them, the smoke alarm went off. Nothing says love like a burning lasagna and a blaring fire alarm.
The Lonely Valentine's Day DJ
Spinning romantic tunes while feeling single
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I played "I Will Always Love You" by Whitney Houston. Someone yelled, "Sing it, DJ!" So, I grabbed the mic and belted it out. Little did they know, my dedication was to the pizza I ordered for one after the gig.
The Heartbreak Detective
Investigating love crimes
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I tried speed dating to gather intel for my cases. When they asked about my profession, I said, "I'm a heartbreak detective." The guy across from me whispered, "I'm a cardiologist." We're now solving love crimes and heart conditions together.
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