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Let's talk about Katy Perry's love for cats. I mean, she's got this whole cat persona going on. She even named her perfume "Purr." Now, I love cats, but if I named a perfume after them, it would probably be called "Eau de Litter Box." Can you imagine if other artists did the same thing? Drake's fragrance: "Hotline Bling." Smells like late-night calls and questionable decisions. But Katy's cat obsession is next level. I'm waiting for her to start a cat-themed amusement park. It would be called "Purr-adise." You get on rides shaped like scratching posts, and the rollercoaster is just a giant ball of yarn.
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You guys ever notice how Katy Perry's songs are like a musical rollercoaster? I mean, one minute she's kissing a girl, and the next, she's roaring like a tiger. I'm just waiting for her to release a song where she's like, "I kissed a girl, roared like a tiger, and then I bought a condo in the jungle." I mean, can we predict her next move? Is there a Katy Perry bingo card I'm not aware of? Maybe her next song will be like, "I kissed a girl, roared like a tiger, and now I'm in therapy because my life is a constant identity crisis.
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You know, Katy Perry has a superpower. It's not flying or turning invisible—it's making fireworks shoot from her chest. I mean, how does that even work? Is there a hidden pyrotechnics team in her bra? Imagine going to the doctor for chest pain, and he's like, "Don't worry, it's just your firework glands acting up again." I want that superpower. I'd be the life of the party! But, you know, also a potential fire hazard. "Hey, guys, gather around, it's time for my rendition of 'Firework'—literally!
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Did you guys know Katy Perry released an album called "Witness"? Yeah, apparently, she wants us all to be witnesses to her music. But here's the thing—I felt like I needed witness protection after listening to it. I mean, I love Katy, but that album had me questioning my life choices. It's like she wanted us all to go through a musical identity crisis with her. "Hey, guys, let's all wear blonde wigs and pretend we're someone else for a while." Thanks, Katy. I'll be in the corner, trying to remember who I was before the "Witness" era.
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