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Why did Jimbo bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!
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What did Jimbo say when he crossed paths with a cat? 'Well, this is just purr-fect timing!
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I told Jimbo a joke about construction, but he didn't get it. It was too concrete for him!
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What did Jimbo say when he saw a cloud? 'That cloud looks a bit mist-erious!
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I asked Jimbo if he's a good swimmer. He said, 'Well, I can do a mean doggy paddle, but I'm still working on the human version.
Jimbo's Grocery Shopping
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Went grocery shopping with Jimbo the other day. He insisted on getting a shopping cart just for a single avocado. I said, Jimbo, are you sure you need a cart for that? He goes, Well, it gets lonely riding solo.
Jimbo's GPS
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You ever notice how Jimbo uses his GPS? I asked him for directions, and he said, Turn left in 500 feet. I said, Jimbo, we're in a parking lot. There's no left in 500 feet unless I drive through that Starbucks and over the shrubbery.
Jimbo's Cooking Show
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Jimbo tried to start a cooking show on YouTube. It's called 'Burnin' With Jimbo.' Spoiler alert: the only thing burning is the fire department's patience.
Jimbo's Fitness Regimen
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Jimbo told me he's on a new fitness regimen. He walks a mile every day, but here's the kicker – he does it in his sleep. I asked him how that works, and he said, Sleepwalking, my friend. It's the future of cardio.
Jimbo's DIY Projects
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Jimbo's into DIY projects. Last week, he tried to build a bookshelf. Let's just say, it's now a modern art installation called 'The Leaning Tower of Jimbo.' I wouldn't trust it with anything heavier than a pamphlet.
Jimbo's Technology Woes
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Jimbo and technology don't mix. He asked me to help him set up his new smart TV. Spent an hour trying to explain the concept of a remote control. He said, Back in my day, the only remote we had was yelling at the kids to change the channel.
Jimbo's Pet Parrot
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Jimbo got a pet parrot recently. Thing's a genius. It learned to mimic Jimbo's snores perfectly. Now, when it gets too loud at night, Jimbo's wife just yells, Quiet, Jimbo! and both of them shut up.
Jimbo's Social Media Strategy
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Jimbo's on social media now. He has two followers – his wife and a bot that's trying to sell him discount life insurance. He's convinced he's a social media influencer. I said, Jimbo, influencing who? The squirrels in your backyard?
Jimbo's Karaoke Night
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Jimbo loves karaoke, but he's the only guy I know who thinks 'Bohemian Rhapsody' is a one-man performance. He goes from Freddie Mercury to a tone-deaf cat stuck in a tree in a matter of seconds.
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