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I've realized jealousy is the only emotion that can make you go from "I'm happy for you" to "I hope you step on a Lego" in a split second.
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Jealousy’s that friend who's always late to the party but arrives with a bang, ready to stir up drama. "Oh, the happiness train's already left? Well, I brought some envy snacks!
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Jealousy is like an uninvited subscriber to your mental newsletter. You try to unsubscribe, but it's like, "Nope, I’ve got a lifetime membership to your thoughts, thank you very much!
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Jealousy is like a competitive sport you didn’t sign up for. You're just minding your business, and suddenly you’re in the Olympics of comparison, trying to win the gold medal in "Who Has the Better Vacation Pics?
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Jealousy is the human version of comparing apples to oranges, but then being upset that the oranges got juicier deals in life. "I wanted that citrusy success, darn it!
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Jealousy is such a paradox. It’s like being simultaneously flattered and annoyed. "Oh, you like my life so much you wanna copy it? Great, but also, get your own playlist, Karen!
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Jealousy has this knack for making you ignore everything good in your life and focus on that one thing someone else has. It’s like having selective vision but for envy.
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Ever notice how jealousy can turn even the most zen person into a detective? Suddenly, they're Sherlock Holmes investigating Instagram stories at 3 AM like, "Exhibit A: Smiling emoji next to someone else's lunch. Case closed, Watson!
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Jealousy's timing is impeccable. It never fails to arrive the moment you're feeling content with life, tapping you on the shoulder like, "Hey, remember that thing you didn’t have two seconds ago? Let's obsess about it!
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