5 Husband N Wife Jokes

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Jun 17 2024

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Weekend Plans

Differing ideas about weekend plans
Husband: "My wife said, 'Let's do something exciting this weekend.' So, I washed my lucky football jersey. Excitement level? Through the roof! Her excitement level? Not so much!

Household Chores

Unequal division of household chores
Husband: "My wife asked if I could vacuum. So I handed her the vacuum and said, 'Sure, show me how it's done.' Turns out, it wasn't the response she was looking for!

Shopping

Shopping habits
Husband: "I told my wife, 'Let's try a quick shopping trip.' She laughed and said, 'Sweetie, in the world of shopping, there's no such thing as 'quick.' It's an adventure!' Turns out, it's an adventure where my wallet's the one taking a hike!

Communication Styles

Different communication styles
Wife: "I told my husband, 'We need to talk.' He immediately looked panicked. Turns out, 'We need to talk' translates to 'I need to talk; you need to listen and agree!'

Bedtime Routines

Differences in bedtime routines
Wife: "I asked my husband to set the alarm. Next morning, I woke up to find out he'd set the microwave timer instead. I mean, waking up to 'beep-beep-beep' is not exactly the most soothing alarm!

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