10 Jokes For Hitchhiking

Observational Jokes

Updated on: Sep 14 2024

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I considered hitchhiking once but then realized I can't even agree on the temperature setting with my family in the car. Imagine trying to negotiate that with a total stranger. "Hey, can you turn the AC up a bit?" "No, I prefer the windows down." It's a highway standoff.
Hitchhiking is the original rideshare app. I mean, forget Uber and Lyft; back in the day, it was just a person on the side of the road with a cardboard sign that said, "Anywhere but here, please!
I tried hitchhiking once, and the only thing I got was a lesson in patience. Standing there with my thumb out, thinking, "Is this how my parents met? Was my dad just a really lonely hitchhiker, and my mom the only one with a working car?
I saw a hitchhiker the other day with a sign that said, "Lost job, need help." I thought, "Buddy, you might have better luck if your sign said, 'Free Wi-Fi in my car.'
The only time I hitchhiked, the guy who picked me up started giving me life advice. It's like, "Dude, I'm just trying to get to the next town, not attend a motivational seminar in your Honda Civic.
Hitchhiking is the ultimate trust exercise. You're literally getting into a stranger's car and hoping they don't have a weird collection of rubber ducks or play polka music on repeat.
You know, hitchhiking is like a weird real-life Tinder. You stand by the side of the road with a sign, hoping someone will pick you up, and then you judge them based on their driving skills instead of their profile picture.
Hitchhiking is like trying to catch a cab in the middle of nowhere. You're standing there waving, hoping someone will stop, and the only response you get is from a confused cow in the field.
Hitchhiking is proof that desperate times call for desperate measures. I mean, you must be in a pretty tight spot if your plan is to stand on the roadside and rely on the kindness of strangers with wheels.
You ever notice how when you see someone hitchhiking, you go through this mental checklist? Is my car clean enough? Do I have snacks? Is my taste in music acceptable for a stranger? It's like preparing for a surprise driving test.

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