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Joke Types
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Why did the helpful assistant get an award? Because he knew how to assist-tance to the occasion!
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Why did the helper bring a ladder to work? Because he heard the job was up-and-coming!
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I asked my assistant to alphabetize my spice rack. Now the thyme is out of joint!
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Why did the helpful computer catch a virus? It tried to solve too many problems at once!
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I hired a helper to fold my laundry, but he was so bad, I had to re-tire him!
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My personal trainer quit because he couldn't find the motivation. I guess he lost his sense of purpose!
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My assistant wanted a raise, so I told him to take it up with HR. He came back with a ladder, saying he wanted a step up!
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Why did the helpful assistant bring a net to work? To catch all the loose ends!
Selective Assistance
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Helpers have this incredible skill of choosing when and where to be helpful. I'll assist with your love life, but when it comes to assembling IKEA furniture, sorry, I've got plans... indefinitely.
The Expert Advice Guru
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Some helpers think they're a walking advice column. Let me solve all your problems, they proclaim, handing out advice like free samples at a grocery store. The trick to success? Simple. Just avoid all forms of work.
The Ghostly Helper
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You know you've hit rock bottom when even the ghost of that 'helper' friend won't lend a hand. I'm haunting from a distance, they whisper from the other side, unwilling to cross over to help with your messy breakup.
The Helpful 'Expert'
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There's always that one person who fancies themselves an expert on everything. I'm a helper, they claim, while trying to teach you how to boil water. Listen, it's all in the wrist action, they say, waving a spatula like a wand.
Helper by Subscription
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Some helpers have a subscription service, it seems. I'll assist you three times a month, they announce, as if helpfulness were some exclusive club with a limited membership. Sorry, assistance not available on weekends or during nap time.
The Emergency Helper
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There's always that friend who's a helper only in emergencies. If it's a life-or-death situation, call me, they declare proudly, forgetting that fixing a broken nail doesn't quite qualify as a 911 scenario.
Help or Hindrance?
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You ever notice how the most enthusiastic helpers end up being the most hindering? Let me assist with your workout routine, they say, as they demonstrate the most creative ways to misuse gym equipment.
Helping... from Afar
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Ever had that friend who offers to help but prefers a more 'hands-off' approach? I'll be there in spirit, they promise, conveniently forgetting they have a physical body that could actually, you know, lend a hand.
The Helper
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You ever notice how everyone's got that one friend who insists they're a helper? They're the kind of person who offers to help move, but mysteriously vanishes when the heavy lifting starts. I'm here for moral support, they say, as they kick back with a soda.
The Helper's Wisdom
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We all know that friend who acts like a self-proclaimed expert in everything. They're the helper with wisdom that seems straight out of a fortune cookie. You know, they say, life's too short to stress about things... unless it's about the correct way to fold socks.
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