4 Jokes For Gacy

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Jun 06 2025

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So, Gacy's ghost is apparently my muse tonight. I'm thinking, what if Gacy's ghost decided to host a cooking show from beyond the grave? I mean, the guy was known for some pretty messed up stuff, but who's to say he couldn't whip up a killer recipe? Pun intended.
I can see it now: "Welcome to Gacy's Ghastly Gourmet! Today, we're making spaghetti... with a side of screams!" And then he'd pull out this ghostly pot and start stirring it with, I don't know, a skeletal hand or something. It's like, "Forget Gordon Ramsay, we've got Gacy's ghost in the kitchen, and he's dying to share his secret ingredients!" I'm just saying, if I'm gonna have a ghost haunting me, it might as well be one with culinary skills.
Alright, so Gacy's still on the agenda. Imagine if instead of haunting, Gacy's ghost decided to become a therapist for other ghosts. Yeah, picture this: Gacy, sitting on a spectral couch, listening to other ghosts' problems. "So, you killed a bunch of people in the '70s? Let's talk about that. How does that make you feel?"
I can just see it now, ghosts from different eras coming in for therapy sessions. And Gacy, with his clown makeup, is like the Dr. Phil of the afterlife. "You've got issues, I've got solutions, and hey, if it doesn't work out, I know a guy who can really bury the hatchet." Ghost therapy, brought to you by John Wayne Gacy.
Hey, everybody! So, my ghostwriter handed me this note that just says "Gacy." You know, like John Wayne Gacy, the infamous serial killer. And I'm thinking, great, I'm supposed to turn this into comedy. I mean, how do you make a joke out of that? But then I thought, what if Gacy's ghost is haunting me, but instead of terrorizing me, he's just a total prankster?
I imagine waking up in the middle of the night, and Gacy's ghost is standing there in his creepy clown makeup, holding a whoopee cushion. He's like, "I may have been a killer in my past life, but now I'm all about that ghostly goof life!" I mean, imagine having a ghost that's just trying to make you laugh. That's the kind of haunting I could get behind. At least he's not trying to bury me under the house.
Okay, last one about Gacy, I promise. So, I'm thinking, what if Gacy's ghost tried to give dating advice? I mean, the guy was married and all, right? So maybe he fancies himself a bit of a Casanova in the afterlife.
Imagine Gacy's ghost showing up in your room, giving you dating tips. "You see, when you're taking someone out for dinner, make sure to choose a place with good lighting, not like those dimly lit basements I used to hang out in." And he'd have this ghostly notepad, scribbling down tips like, "Compliment their looks, but maybe avoid talking about clowns." Dating advice from a serial killer ghost—what could go wrong?

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