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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To keep his pants up in case he had to slide down the pole!
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Why did the fireman bring a pencil to the fire station? In case he had to draw a hose!
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Firemen are the real-life superheroes, you know? But let's be honest, I've never seen Batman getting stuck in a tree and needing a ladder to get down.
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I recently learned that firemen have their own calendar. I thought, 'That's interesting. I have a calendar too, but it's just pictures of pizza on every page.'
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Firemen are trained to rescue cats from trees. Now, I don't want to sound ungrateful, but how about rescuing my WiFi signal from the dead zone in my living room? That's a real emergency!
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I tried to impress my date once by telling her I was a fireman. She got really excited until I clarified that I meant I was really good at putting out small kitchen fires. Romantic, right?
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I thought about joining the fire department, but then I realized I panic every time the toaster pops. Handling a real fire might be a bit out of my league. 'Help, my bagel is too crispy!' doesn't quite have the same ring to it.
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I asked a fireman how he stays so calm under pressure. He said, 'Easy, I just imagine the fire yelling, 'Hey, you missed a spot over here!'
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You ever notice how firemen always slide down the pole when there's an emergency? I tried that at work, and let's just say HR wasn't as impressed. Apparently, it's 'not a safe or appropriate office exit strategy.'
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Firemen are brave, no doubt. But have you ever tried saving your pizza from burning in the oven without oven mitts? Now that's a real test of courage!
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I told my friend, 'If your house is on fire, don't worry, I got you covered.' He looked relieved until I handed him a fire extinguisher and said, 'You're in charge. I'm more of a moral support kind of guy.'
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