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I was driving through the countryside the other day, and I saw a sign that said, "Beware of Farmer's Daughter." I thought, is she dangerous, or is it more of a "beware of awkward conversations at the dinner table" kind of thing?
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Dating a farmer's daughter is like attending a crash course in agricultural terminology. I learned that "bailing" isn't just something you do when a date is going south; it also involves hay and machinery.
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You ever notice how every small town seems to have a farmer's daughter? I mean, is there a secret farm where they all hang out, sharing tips on how to hide from city slickers?
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I thought I was being smooth, telling the farmer's daughter that she must be the cream of the crop. She responded with, "Yeah, just like our prize-winning dairy cow." Note to self: agricultural compliments need some serious refinement.
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I asked the farmer's daughter what her idea of a perfect date was, and she said, "Watching the sunset over the fields." I didn't have the heart to tell her that my idea of a perfect date involves less manure scent and more air freshener.
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I asked a farmer's daughter out on a date, and she said, "Sure, we can go for a romantic tractor ride." I didn't realize that would involve more mud and cow sightings than a typical date in the city.
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I met a farmer's daughter at a local fair, and she invited me to her family's farm. I thought it would be all idyllic and romantic, but it turns out, the only thing she wanted help planting was the idea that I should leave before her dad got home!
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I tried impressing a farmer's daughter by talking about my vegetable garden. She just laughed and said, "Honey, we've been growing our own food since before it was cool." Well, excuse me, Miss Organic Pioneer!
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You know you're in a small town when the most scandalous thing that happens is the farmer's daughter bringing a vegetarian to the barbecue. They looked at me like I brought a spaceship instead of a salad.
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