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The effectiveness of my memory is so bad that I have to set a reminder to check my reminders. I'm like a human version of the movie Inception, but instead of dreams within dreams, it's reminders within reminders.
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Grocery shopping has reached a new level of effectiveness with those self-checkout machines. They're like the ultimate test of trust – trusting that I won't accidentally ring up a $50 steak as a bag of bananas. Sorry, cashier, it was an honest mistake!
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I recently discovered the incredible effectiveness of the snooze button on my alarm clock. It's like a magical button that transforms morning into a series of mini-naps with the occasional panic attack thrown in. Whoever invented it deserves a Nobel Prize in procrastination.
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My gym recently installed TVs on every treadmill for maximum workout effectiveness. Now, instead of getting fit, I find myself watching cooking shows while jogging. I call it the "foodie workout plan." Spoiler alert: it's not very effective.
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Trying to assemble IKEA furniture is a great test of a relationship's effectiveness. Forget couples therapy; just build a bookshelf together. If you can survive the confusing instructions and missing screws without breaking up, you're basically unstoppable.
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Have you ever noticed the surprising effectiveness of pretending to be on the phone when you don't want to talk to someone? It's the social equivalent of wearing an invisibility cloak. I've mastered the art of fake conversations just to avoid small talk at the grocery store.
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You know you're an adult when you get excited about the effectiveness of a new vacuum cleaner. I recently upgraded mine, and now I vacuum my entire apartment just for the sheer satisfaction of watching dirt disappear. My younger self would be so disappointed.
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They say laughter is the best medicine, but have you tried the effectiveness of a good nap? It's like a magical reset button for the soul. I take power naps so seriously that I've considered putting it on my resume under "special skills.
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You know you're getting old when you start using "effectiveness" as a criteria for choosing household items. I caught myself standing in the kitchen aisle, debating the effectiveness of different dish soap brands. I never thought I'd be judging cleaning supplies like an Olympic judge scores a gymnastics routine.
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