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Joke Types
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How do you know coffee is a gentleman? It always stands up when you go to sip!
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Why did the coffee bring a blanket to the party? It wanted to stay warm, but not filter out the fun!
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Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many issues to filter through!
Coffee Math
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You know you're a true coffee lover when you can calculate the exact number of beans needed for the perfect brew in your sleep. Forget algebra; my math skills are all about ratios of water to coffee at 7 AM.
Decaf Dilemma
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I tried decaf once. It was like kissing your sister—completely wrong and not at all satisfying. Decaf is just a sad excuse for coffee, like a romantic comedy without the romance or the comedy.
Coffee and Dreams
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I have a dream that one day my coffee will be judged not by the color of its roast but by the content of its caffeine. I mean, who needs equality when you have espresso?
Coffee Shop Wi-Fi
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You know you spend too much time in coffee shops when your phone automatically connects to the Wi-Fi, and the barista gives you a nod of approval. It's like, Welcome back, sir. Your usual latte and internet connection are ready.
Coffee Breath Confessions
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Coffee breath is a thing, and it's the unspoken truth among coffee lovers. I've had conversations with people who were so close, they could probably count the coffee beans in my last sip. It's not halitosis; it's the fragrance of true dedication.
Coffee vs. My Bank Account
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My bank account is like, Can we talk about these coffee shop transactions? And I'm like, Look, if I wanted financial advice, I'd ask someone who doesn't spend a small fortune on fancy lattes.
Coffee and Confusion
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You know you're deep into coffee culture when you walk into a café, and the menu is more confusing than your love life. I just wanted a simple cup of coffee, not a philosophical journey into the world of exotic beans.
Relationship Status: Coffee
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I recently updated my relationship status on social media. It now says, In a committed relationship with coffee. At least with coffee, I know it won't break up with me over an argument about doing the dishes.
Coffee Lovers Anonymous
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Alright, so I heard there's a group called Coffee Lovers Anonymous. I mean, who are they trying to fool? You can't kick a coffee addiction; you can only learn to embrace it with open arms and jittery hands!
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