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The Coffee Hater
Navigating a world that seems obsessed with coffee
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There's so much pressure to like coffee. At social events, when people find out I don't drink coffee, they look at me like I just said I enjoy bathing in pickle juice. "You don't like coffee? What's wrong with you?
The DIY Coffee Enthusiast
Trying to recreate the coffee shop experience at home
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I wanted to make a trendy cold brew at home. After 12 hours of brewing, I tasted it, and I thought, "This tastes like regret and wasted time. Back to the convenience store iced coffee for me.
The Coffee Shop Barista
Dealing with picky customers and complicated orders
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A lady asked for a decaf espresso and then complained it didn't taste strong enough. I said, "Ma'am, that's like ordering a non-alcoholic beer and complaining it doesn't give you a buzz.
The Casual Coffee Drinker
Navigating the intense coffee culture without being a connoisseur
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I went to a coffee tasting event, and they were talking about the "notes" in the coffee. I'm sorry, but if my coffee has notes, it better be writing me a heartfelt apology for waking me up so early.
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