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Daylight saving time is proof that even time can't escape the confusion of a Monday morning. "Let's throw off everyone's schedule and see if they notice. Spoiler alert: they do.
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You ever notice how during daylight saving time, everyone becomes a detective? "Is it 3 AM or 4 AM? I feel like Sherlock Holmes, but instead of solving crimes, I'm just trying not to be late for work.
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Daylight saving time is the only time when being an hour early makes you fashionably early. "I'm not early; I'm just living in the past. Fashionably, of course – my analog watch said so.
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Daylight saving time is like the government's attempt at a magic trick. "Ta-da! We made an hour disappear! Now, who wants to volunteer for our next illusion, balancing the budget?
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You ever notice how setting the clocks back feels like time travel for lazy people? "Oh, it's 2 AM? Let me just dial it back to 1 AM and call it a night. Time Lord level: Novice.
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Daylight saving time is the only time when being fashionably late means you're just punctual. "I'm not late; I'm just waiting for my clock to catch up with my stylish entrance.
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Turning the clocks back is the adult version of finding a cheat code for more sleep. "Up, up, down, down, left, right, zzz... Ah, the Konami Code of Restful Nights.
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You ever set your clocks back and feel like a time-traveling wizard? "Behold, I have granted myself the gift of an extra hour! Now, what should I do with this newfound power? Probably hit snooze.
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Turning the clock back is like giving yourself a bonus round in the game of life. "Congratulations! You've earned an extra hour to contemplate your life choices. Use it wisely – or just binge-watch another season on Netflix.
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