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Christmas Tree's Perspective
Christmas tree upset about being chopped down.
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Ever notice how they sing "O Christmas Tree" with so much love while they're slowly watching you die in their cozy homes? It's like being serenaded on your deathbed.
Santa's Perspective
Santa's frustration with outdated Christmas songs.
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Ever notice how they always ask if I'm coming to town? Like, I'm not Santa Uber, I don't take requests.
Snowman's Perspective
Snowman's frustration with global warming.
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Do you know how tough it is to be a snowman when the only thing that's snowing is disappointment? I've become a seasonal job with no job security.
Rudolph's Perspective
Rudolph feeling exploited for his red nose.
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They say my nose is so bright it can guide Santa's sleigh. But have you ever tried sleeping with a nightlight that's also a beacon for a guy hauling a sleighful of gifts? It's not as magical as it sounds.
Elf's Perspective
Elf's dissatisfaction with the Christmas work environment.
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Deck the Halls with Boughs of Holly." Sure, but who's decking the elf dorms with boughs of exhaustion and regret? I haven't had a decent night's sleep since the last time someone sang "Silent Night," and that was never.
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