5 Jokes For Chainsaws

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Feb 09 2025

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Chainsaw vs. Butter Knife

The envy of chainsaws when compared to other cutting tools
Chainsaws have low self-esteem. I overheard mine talking to a utility knife, saying, "You're so precise and delicate. I'm just loud and messy." The utility knife responded, "Well, you have a point.

Chainsaw Therapy Session

When chainsaws need therapy for their existential crisis
Took my chainsaw to therapy, and the therapist asked, "Why are you feeling so cut up about your job?" The chainsaw replied, "It's just hard to see trees go, you know? They're like family... but with more leaves.

Chainsaw Stand-Up

Chainsaws trying to break into the comedy scene
I suggested my chainsaw do observational comedy. Its first joke was, "Ever notice how trees always fall when no one is around? It's like they're trying to be discreet. I'm like, 'I can still hear you, you know!'

Lumberjack's Lament

When chainsaws have more drama than a soap opera
Last night, my chainsaw caught me talking to the lawnmower. Now it won't stop giving me the cold shoulder. I guess it's a jealous saw.

Horror Movie Chainsaws

Chainsaws during a horror movie have performance anxiety
I asked my chainsaw why it's always so timid in horror movies. It replied, "Have you seen the script? I'm not risking my chain on those cheesy plot twists.

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