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Car shows are the only place where it's socially acceptable to take pictures of someone else's vehicle like you're a detective solving a car-related crime. "Hold on, let me just get a close-up of that tire tread pattern. CSI: Auto Edition!
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Ever notice how at a car show, people talk about cars like they're members of the family? "This is my baby, my pride and joy." I'm over here thinking, "Wow, your baby is looking really shiny and waxed today.
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The car show is the only place where the phrase "nice rims" isn't a compliment about someone's personality. If only we could judge people based on the size and shine of their rims in everyday life. "Oh, you got 20-inch chrome rims? You must be a fantastic person!
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The car show is the only place where people willingly pay money to look at things they can't afford. "Yes, I'd like to see the $500,000 sports car, please. No, I won't be buying it. I just want to dream about it in high definition.
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You ever been to a car show? It's like a fashion show for vehicles. I went there expecting to see cars strutting down the runway, doing a little twirl, maybe flashing some headlights. Instead, I just walked around awkwardly, pretending to know the difference between a sedan and a coupe. "Ah yes, that's a fine example of four-wheel excellence right there!
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I tried to impress someone at a car show by using car lingo. I pointed at a sports car and said, "Look at the aerodynamics on that beauty!" Turns out, I just looked like a confused seagull trying to describe flying techniques.
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Car shows make you realize how judgmental we are about vehicles. You hear someone say, "Oh, he drives a minivan," and suddenly it's like they confessed to a crime. "Yeah, and he probably has kids, too. What a rebel.
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Went to a car show recently, and the enthusiasm of some people is infectious. I saw a guy hugging a car like it just told him he's the best driver in the world. I didn't have the heart to tell him that his car doesn't actually love him back. Sorry, buddy, it's just metal and plastic.
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At a car show, everyone becomes an automotive expert. It's like a magical place where suddenly everyone knows the horsepower, torque, and fuel efficiency of every car on display. I'm there like, "Yeah, that one's fast, and that one's... also fast. I think.
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