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Why did the music teacher go to jail? Because she got caught with the sax offender!
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Why did the musician throw away their table? Because it couldn't handle the bass!
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Why don't musicians ever play hide and seek? Because good players are always found!
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Why did the musician get kicked out of the band? They couldn't handle the brass!
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Why did the guitarist get in trouble at the airport? They were caught trying to smuggle a fretful item!
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Bands are like relationships - they start with a lot of excitement, everyone's in sync, and then suddenly, you realize the drummer is the only one who knows where the beat is!
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Why do bands always break up? Because just like a bag of chips, everyone wants to be the lead, but nobody wants to be the bass.
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The only thing more delicate than a musician's ego is the drumstick they're holding. One wrong comment, and that stick might just go flying – both metaphorically and literally.
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Being in a band is like being in a three-legged race. You're tied to these people, and you're desperately trying not to trip over each other while making beautiful music. Spoiler alert: You usually trip.
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I tried starting a band once, but we couldn't agree on a name. It's hard to rock out when you're arguing over whether 'The Flatulent Melons' has the right vibe.
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Trying to keep a band together is like herding cats. Everyone's got their own direction, and they'll only listen if you dangle a shiny opportunity in front of them. Preferably one with groupies.
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The Band: Where the only thing they're practicing is their ability to break up and make up faster than Ross and Rachel on a caffeine high!
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Being in a band is like having a part-time job where the only benefits are questionable decisions and a constant fear of your lead guitarist's homemade kombucha.
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Ever notice how a band starts as a harmony of dreams and ends up sounding like a broken record of 'I thought we agreed on the setlist'?
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