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Ever notice how the five-second rule turns into a 30-minute debate when you drop something in public? "Is this floor clean? Do they mop here? Is that a shoe print or a tire track?
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I love how we all pretend to understand the purpose of the extra shoelace hole. You know, that tiny one at the top? It's like our shoes have a secret society, and we're just here guessing the password.
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You ever try to discreetly sniff your armpits in public? It's like you're doing some secret spy move, but everyone knows exactly what's going on. "Nothing to see here, just checking if my deodorant is still on duty.
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Why do we always assume our GPS is judging us when it says "Recalculating"? It's like, "Sorry, GPS, I took a detour for a scenic route, not because I missed the turn. Stop being so passive-aggressive.
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Why do we all act like we're on a hidden camera prank show when the self-checkout voice suddenly says, "Unexpected item in the bagging area"? Like, no Karen, I didn't sneak in a watermelon without you noticing; it's just as much a surprise to me!
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We all have that one drawer at home, the "miscellaneous" drawer. It's like the Bermuda Triangle of household items. Need a random screw, a birthday candle, or an expired coupon? It's all in there, tangled up in a chaotic mess.
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You ever accidentally like someone's post from two years ago while stalking their profile? It's like digital archaeology, and you instantly become a member of the "Deep Likers" society. Don't worry, we've all been there.
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You ever notice how we all become professional actors when someone knocks on the bathroom door at our home? "Occupied!" Like, what am I doing in here? Rehearsing for my one-man show "Shower Thoughts"?
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Isn't it weird how we all become professional meteorologists when deciding what to wear in the morning? We check the weather app, look outside, consult a magic eight ball, and still end up with a raincoat on a sunny day.
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