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You know, I was talking to this 10-year-old kid the other day, and he drops some knowledge on me. He goes, "You know, adults always say don't play with your food, but have you ever tried making broccoli look like a spaceship? It's an art form!" And I'm like, "Kid, you might be onto something. Maybe I've been missing out on the gourmet side of dining my whole life!
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You try negotiating nap time with a 10-year-old; it's like brokering a peace deal in the Middle East. "Just 20 minutes," I say. He looks at me dead in the eyes and goes, "How about 15 and a snack?" I'm like, "Kid, are you negotiating peace in the Middle East or my sanity?" It's like dealing with a tiny lawyer who specializes in bedtime litigation.
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So, I ask this 10-year-old, "What's your favorite subject in school?" And he goes, "Coding." I'm like, "Coding? I was struggling with the multiplication table at your age!" These kids today are so tech-savvy; they probably have an app that calculates the probability of their parents saying 'yes' to a sleepover. Meanwhile, I was mastering the art of passing notes in class.
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You ever try helping a 10-year-old with homework these days? They hand you this worksheet, and I'm looking at it like, "Is this the quadratic formula or a treasure map?" I mean, I need a PhD just to understand their math problems. "Johnny has 37 watermelons, and he gives away 22 to Susie. How many watermelons does Johnny have left?" I'm sitting there thinking, "Who's Johnny, and why does he have so many watermelons? Is he running a black-market fruit stand?
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