bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
Let's talk about the gifts at this 60th birthday party. I've never seen so many presents that came with user manuals. I mean, if your gift requires an instruction booklet, it might be time to rethink your life choices. And the practical gifts! Aunt Mildred gave the birthday person a magnifying glass. Not for reading, mind you, but for deciphering the fine print on medication bottles. It's like saying, "Happy Birthday! Here's to clearer terms and conditions for your existence!
0
0
You know you're officially getting old when you start looking forward to your colonoscopy more than your birthday. I recently attended a 60th birthday party, and let me tell you, it was like a celebration of survival. People were popping champagne bottles not to toast to the birthday person but to congratulate them on making it this far without falling apart! You ever notice how the candles on the cake have to be strategically placed so they don't set off the fire alarm? I mean, at 60, you've got more wax on your cake than in your ears. And blowing out those candles? It's not about making a wish; it's a lung capacity test!
0
0
So, we're all sitting around at this 60th birthday party, and someone brings out the old photo albums. You know you're getting up there when the photos are in black and white and not just because they're from the 1800s, but because color photography hadn't been invented yet. People were reminiscing about the good old days, and I'm thinking, "Wait, wasn't the good old days when we could remember why we walked into a room?" At 60, you don't go down memory lane; you park there because you forgot where you were headed in the first place.
0
0
At this 60th birthday party, I couldn't help but notice how excited everyone was about senior discounts. I mean, they were like kids in a candy store, if the candy store sold blood pressure medication and orthopedic shoes. It's like a competition to see who can get the best deal. I saw Uncle Bob arguing with the cashier over 10% off a can of soup. I'm thinking, Bob, it's a dollar fifty! Just pay the man! At 60, the only thing you should be arguing about is who gets the last piece of cake.
Post a Comment