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The Time Traveler
Shocked by the unpredictability of the 2016 outcome
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Time travelers are the worst at predicting elections. I went back to 2016, asked who won, and they said, "Oh, it's obvious. It's obviously... well, not who you think.
The Alien Observer
Confused by the chaos of human elections
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I bet the aliens are placing bets on us, thinking, "I've got 50 space bucks on the one who promises to fix climate change. Oh wait, none of them did? Well, I guess we're back to abducting cows for entertainment.
The Conspiracy Theorist
Believes the election was rigged
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I asked the conspiracy theorist what he thought about voting machines. He said, "Those machines are like my ex – always changing their mind, and I never end up satisfied!
The Pessimistic Optimist
Hoping for the best, expecting the worst
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The problem with being a pessimistic optimist during the election is that every time someone said, "It can't get worse," I'd think, "Challenge accepted!" It's like a reverse motivational speech.
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