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Parents these days have it rough, especially with all this smart technology. When I was 10, if I wanted to know something, I had to ask my parents or consult the wise oracle known as the Encyclopaedia Britannica. Now, a 10-year-old has Google, Siri, and Alexa at their beck and call. I overheard a parent the other day arguing with their 10-year-old about homework. The parent said, "When I was your age, I had to go to the library and spend hours looking through dusty old books to find information." And the kid replied, "Well, when you were my age, they probably hadn't invented electricity yet."
I'm convinced these kids are born with an innate knowledge of technology. I handed a 10-year-old my old rotary phone the other day, and they stared at it like I just handed them a relic from an ancient civilization. "Is this a prop from a historical movie?" they asked. I felt like a museum exhibit.
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Playgrounds were the battlegrounds of our childhood, right? But when I was 10, we played games like tag, hide and seek, and four square. Now, these kids have turned the playground into a mini-Olympics with games that require an advanced degree in strategy and coordination. I asked a 10-year-old about their favorite game, and they started explaining something called "extreme hopscotch." Apparently, it involves acrobatics, synchronized jumping, and a rulebook thicker than a Tolstoy novel. I'm just thinking, "Can't we go back to the days when the biggest argument was whether the ball was in or out during a kickball game?"
And don't get me started on the complexity of the rules. I tried joining in, and the 10-year-olds treated me like an alien trying to play intergalactic chess. "You can't stand on that square! That's a safe zone! Haven't you read the updated regulations?" No, kid, I haven't. I was too busy playing in the era of simpler times.
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You ever notice how kids these days are growing up way too fast? I mean, when I was 10 years old, my biggest concern was whether my Tamagotchi was still alive or if my Game Boy batteries were charged. Now, 10-year-olds are out there with smartphones, managing their social media presence like CEOs of tiny, prepubescent corporations. I was 10, and the most rebellious thing I did was sneaking an extra cookie before dinner. These kids today are out here attending virtual meetings for their Fortnite clans, negotiating peace treaties on the playground, and probably filing tax returns for their lemonade stands. What happened to just enjoying being a kid?
I tried to reminisce with a 10-year-old the other day. I said, "Back in my day, we didn't have TikTok; we had to make up our own dance moves in the living room." And they looked at me like I just described churning butter. I feel like a relic from the past.
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Remember when you were 10, and parent-teacher conferences were like facing a firing squad? You'd sit there, your teacher listing your shortcomings like a prosecutor presenting evidence. "He talks too much in class," "He daydreams," "He doesn't complete his assignments." And your parents would sit there nodding, as if they just discovered you were leading a double life as a secret agent. Now, these parent-teacher conferences involve PowerPoint presentations, Excel spreadsheets, and laser pointers. I swear, I saw a 10-year-old pull out a pie chart to explain their math grades. Meanwhile, I'm reminiscing about the good old days when my biggest concern was not getting caught passing notes in class.
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