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I saw a woman carrying a designer doggy bag, and I thought, "That's not for picking up poop; that's a fashion statement!" I bet the dog feels like a superstar knowing its waste is being transported in a bag that costs more than my shoes.
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I saw a woman walking her dog, and they both had this synchronized look of judgment when they passed by my house. I swear, even the dog was side-eyeing me like, "Did you see what they're wearing? Rough choice.
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You know you've reached peak adulting when you get excited about a new leash for your dog. It's like, forget about fancy cars or a big house – give me a retractable leash with a built-in flashlight, and I'm living my best life.
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I admire how dogs can instantly make friends with each other during walks. Meanwhile, humans are like, "Should I say 'hi'? Is it weird to introduce myself to someone just because our dogs seem to be hitting it off?
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Have you ever noticed that when a dog sees another dog, it's like they're at a canine red carpet event? There's sniffing, tail wagging, and a whole lot of posing. I'm just waiting for the day they start pawtographing each other's paws.
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Dogs are experts at pulling you towards interesting smells during walks. It's like having your own personal tour guide to the world of forgotten pizza crusts and mystery puddles. Who needs a travel agent when you have a dog with a nose for adventure?
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Walking a dog is the ultimate multitasking workout. It's a cardio exercise for you, a sniff-fest for the dog, and a chance to practice your ninja skills as you attempt to untangle yourself from the leash without looking like a complete klutz.
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Walking a dog is the only time it's socially acceptable to talk to strangers about bowel movements. You find yourself discussing your dog's bathroom habits with someone you just met, like you're exchanging stock market tips or something.
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You ever notice how walking a dog is like having a tiny mobile social network? You're out there, making connections, getting the latest neighborhood gossip, all while your dog is just trying to leave its own version of a Facebook status on every fire hydrant.
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