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I met a Nicole who claimed she never binge-watches TV shows. I was like, "Come on, Nicole, everyone has that one guilty pleasure show... mine is 'How It's Made,' but that's beside the point.
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You ever notice how people named Nicole always seem to have their life together? I mean, I can barely remember where I left my keys, and Nicole over there is probably organizing her sock drawer by color.
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I met a Nicole who said she loves spontaneity. I asked her to define spontaneity, and she handed me a color-coded calendar for the next six months.
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I asked a Nicole if she's ever been to a fast-food drive-thru. She looked at me like I suggested she wrestle a bear. "Darling, I haven't seen the inside of a drive-thru since the '90s.
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The name Nicole sounds like the title of a Netflix documentary. "Nicole: The Untold Story of Someone Who Never Forgets to Send Thank You Cards.
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I tried giving my cat a sophisticated name like Nicole, thinking it would make her more refined. Now I just have a cat that ignores me with an air of superiority.
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I'm convinced that when you're born with the name Nicole, the universe just hands you an instruction manual on how to be effortlessly classy.
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You ever notice how whenever someone says, "I have a friend named Nicole," you just assume she must be incredibly wise? Like, Nicole probably knows the meaning of life and the secret to folding a fitted sheet correctly.
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You ever notice how whenever someone says, "I have a friend named Nicole," you immediately picture them gracefully sipping herbal tea while discussing the stock market?
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