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Spelling bees make you question your entire education. They throw a word at you, and you're standing there like, "Did I miss the day in school when we covered words that sound like they're speaking Klingon?
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I love how in spelling bees, the kid spells a ridiculously hard word correctly, and the audience claps like they just witnessed a magic trick. "Abracadabra, you spelled 'pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis' correctly. Bravo!
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I always thought spelling bees were a conspiracy by the dictionary industry to make us feel like we need more words in our lives. "Sorry, 'normal' words aren't enough. We need you to know how to spell 'sesquipedalianism.'
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I always wondered if the kids who excel in spelling bees grow up to become those annoying people who correct your grammar on social media. "It's 'you're,' not 'your.' I learned that in the third grade, loser.
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I was in a spelling bee once. Got eliminated on the word "entrepreneur." Ironic, right? I couldn't even spell the word that probably describes the person who invented spelling bees.
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Spelling bees are the only place where "xylophone" is considered a legitimate word. I mean, when was the last time you used that in a sentence? "I played the xylophone at the office meeting today, and HR had some questions.
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In a spelling bee, they give you a word, and suddenly you forget everything you've ever learned. It's like a pop quiz for selective amnesia. "Your word is 'psychology.' Can you use it in a sentence?" No, I can't, because I forgot what a sentence is.
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You ever notice how spelling bees are the only place where you'll find kids more stressed than their parents during tax season? "I before E except after C" sounds more like a financial advice hotline than a spelling tip.
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