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If smurfs were in the modern world, they'd have a tough time with technology. "Siri, where's the closest mushroom patch?" Siri: "I'm sorry, I can't find any information on smurf-friendly locations.
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Imagine a smurf job interview. "So, Smurfy, what skills do you bring to the table?" "Well, I'm excellent at smurfing, smurf management, and, of course, smurf communication." The HR rep is just nodding, pretending to understand.
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So, Papa Smurf is the leader, right? But have you noticed he's the only one with a beard? Is that the secret to leadership – facial hair? No wonder my boss has a beard!
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How do smurfs count? I mean, they only have three fingers. Counting to five must be a real challenge for them. "Let's see, one smurf, two smurf, three smurf... oh, wait, I lost count.
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You ever notice how smurfs never age? I want whatever anti-aging cream they're using. I've seen cartoons from the '80s; those smurfs look the same today. Maybe it's the mushroom diet.
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You ever notice how smurfs always wear the same outfit? I mean, come on, Papa Smurf, give them a wardrobe budget! It's like they're in a perpetual cartoon closet malfunction.
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I bet the Smurf language is just them adding "smurf" to everything. "Hey, Smurfette, let's smurf to the smurf and smurf some smurf." It's like they took a crash course in linguistic smurfology.
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Smurfs are like the original squad goals. They all have different roles – Papa Smurf, Brainy Smurf, Lazy Smurf. I'm just waiting for Millennial Smurf to show up with an avocado toast and an Instagram account.
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You ever wonder why Gargamel is so obsessed with catching smurfs? I mean, what's his endgame? A smurf farm? Does he want to open a little blue restaurant? "Today's special, smurf stew!
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