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The Aspiring Superhero
When you witness a seizure, but you're torn between helping and wondering if this is the start of someone's superhero origin story.
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Imagine someone's seizing, and you're thinking, "What if this is how the Avengers got started? Maybe Thor started with a little involuntary hammer twirling. You never know!
The Technophobe
When you witness a seizure, but all you can think about is how technology might be involved, like did they accidentally swallow a USB stick?
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During a seizure, I panicked, thinking, "Did they accidentally ingest an Apple product? Are we witnessing the birth of the iSeizure? Steve Jobs did say technology would change lives, but this is next level.
The Concerned Friend
When your friend starts having seizures, but you're also worried about what's happening to your favorite snacks in the kitchen.
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They say during a seizure, you should clear the area of any dangerous objects. Meanwhile, I'm in the background, frantically hiding my expensive bottle of hot sauce. Priorities, people.
The Paranoid Chef
When you're a chef and someone starts seizing, but all you can think about is the impact on your restaurant's Yelp reviews.
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People ask me, "What did you do during that seizure?" I replied, "What any self-respecting chef would do – I made sure the soufflé was rising, even if my heart was sinking.
The Overly Literal Lifeguard
When you're a lifeguard and someone starts seizing, but you're stuck wondering if this counts as a new kind of synchronized swimming.
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Drowning" in paperwork after a seizure incident. Who knew being a lifeguard required so much paperwork? I signed up for saving lives, not becoming a part-time secretary.
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