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What did the drill sergeant say to the new recruit? 'Get ready to get 'rig'-orous!
Rigged Elevator Etiquette
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Elevators have this unspoken rule: if you press the button more than once, the elevator will magically arrive faster. It's like the elevator is saying, Oh, my bad, didn't see you were in a hurry. Let me just override this slowpoke setting.
Rigged Traffic Lights
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Traffic lights are the ultimate puppet masters. You're sitting there at a red light, and the person in front of you is busy touching up their makeup or drafting a novel. The moment it turns green, they become the world's slowest drag racer.
Rigged GPS Directions
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GPS directions are deceptive. It says, Turn right in 500 feet. You start signaling, and suddenly it's yelling, Recalculating! I'm just trying to drive; I didn't sign up for a surprise pop quiz in spatial awareness.
Rigged New Year's Resolutions
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New Year's resolutions are like a rigged game show. You start with high hopes, thinking you'll lose weight, learn a new language, and conquer the world. By February, you're back on the couch, binge-watching a new language on subtitles.
Rigmarole Roulette
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You ever feel like life is playing a game of Rigmarole Roulette with you? Like, you wake up, spin the wheel, and it's like, Congratulations! Today's challenge: untangle yourself from a mess of headphones, chargers, and adult responsibilities.
Rigged Sock Conspiracy
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Laundry day is a rigged sock conspiracy. I put ten pairs of socks in the wash, and somehow only nine come out. Where do they go? Is there a secret society of solo socks plotting their escape from the drawer?
Rigged Alarm Clocks
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Alarm clocks are like sadistic game show hosts. You set them up, hoping for a gentle wake-up call, and they hit you with the musical equivalent of a sledgehammer. I wake up thinking I survived a sonic assault rather than peacefully rising to a new day.
Rigged Wi-Fi Signal
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Wi-Fi signals are rigged against us. It's like they're playing hide and seek. You find a strong signal in one corner of the room, but the moment you sit down, it disappears. I swear, my Wi-Fi is just practicing its magic tricks.
Rigged Diet Plans
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I tried this new diet, and I'm convinced it's rigged. They said, Eat whatever you want in moderation. So, I had one chocolate chip cookie, and suddenly my pants decided to go on a permanent vacation!
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