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Have you ever noticed how "How are you?" has become more of a greeting than an actual question? It's like the universal code for "Hello, I acknowledge your existence.
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Isn't it interesting how "Wait a second" has evolved into a phrase that could mean anything from a literal second to an indeterminate period of time? It's like the Swiss Army knife of delaying tactics.
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Why do we call it a "quick question" when it almost always leads to a lengthy conversation? I've never had a "quick question" that didn't somehow spiral into a full-blown discussion.
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Ever noticed how "I'll be there in five minutes" has this magical ability to stretch into a concept of time that Einstein himself would find perplexing? It's like time enters a whole new dimension when punctuality is involved.
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Have you ever noticed how "Are you asleep?" is the most rhetorical question ever? I mean, if someone's asleep, they're not really in a position to answer, are they?
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You know, I've always wondered, why do we say "heads up" when we want someone to duck? Shouldn't it be more like "heads down"? I mean, if anything, "heads up" might cause a collision!
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Isn't it funny how "Just a minute" never actually means sixty seconds? It's more like a mysterious unit of time that ranges from a minute to an eternity depending on who says it.
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Why is it that when someone says "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you," it's always followed by a laugh? I mean, do they think we're just chuckling because we're nervous?
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You know, "Guess what?" is such a misleading question. You're not really asking someone to guess; you're just excited to tell them something. It's more like a pop quiz with no correct answer.
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