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Why did the tourist always carry a map in the amusement park? To navigate the rollercoaster of attractions!
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Why did the tourist wear a helmet to the museum? In case they had a brush with history!
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Why did the tourist bring a pencil to the beach? In case they wanted to draw some attention!
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What do you call a tourist who's also a gardener? A sightseeing horticulturist!
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Why did the tourist take a ladder to the beach? To elevate their sunbathing experience!
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Why did the tourist bring a ladder to the theme park? Because they wanted to take their vacation to the next level!
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How do you find a lost tourist in an amusement park? Look for someone going in circles on the carousel!
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I tried to be a helpful local and recommended a tourist-friendly restaurant. The next day, I saw them eating at a place that served deep-fried scorpions. I guess my Yelp review wasn't persuasive enough.
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Tourists and selfie sticks – it's like they're on a covert mission to poke everyone's eye out. It's the only war where the casualties are eyebrows and personal space.
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Tourists love collecting souvenirs like it's a competitive sport. I went to a friend's house, and it looked like they won the gold medal in 'Most Fridge Magnets Per Square Inch.'
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I overheard a tourist asking for 'authentic local cuisine.' The waiter looked confused, probably thinking, 'Lady, this is a McDonald's. Welcome to global cuisine.'
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I saw a tourist staring at a map for hours. I thought, 'Is this a new form of meditation or just an extreme case of 'Lost' reboot?'
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I asked a tourist for directions, and they handed me a selfie stick. I guess I'll find my way with panoramic views, thank you very much.
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Tourists are the only people who can turn a historic monument into a personal photoshoot. I swear, if those statues could talk, they'd be screaming, 'Get off my lawn!'
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Tourists have this uncanny ability to make a quiet, serene place sound like a rock concert. I visited a library once, and there was a tourist whispering so loudly that even the books were shushing him.
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Tourists, they're like human GPS with questionable fashion choices. I mean, who needs a map when you can follow the guy wearing socks with sandals?
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